Back in Baach

29 03 2007

I’ve just had a catch-up with the Baach. For the record, Baach is stoked at the idea of blogging fame, although she’s not really sure what blogging is and if it’s a good thing or not. Letters to the editor was about the closest analogy we could agree on.

We had a big discussion about flirtation, Baach being very unsure about how to take a kiss on the cheek from a gentleman friend, who invited her around to “see his photos” and then planted a sloppy one shortly before an affronted Baach bolted down the street. There was a lot of giggling involved but we decided he was probably just being polite rather than trying it on.

Not that he wouldn’t try it on if he thought he had a chance, because according to the other ladies in the village Baach is famous around there and she could have any of the eligible bachelors she wanted. We had a big discussion about that, too, the Baach being unable to work out why she’d be famous, me explaining that in the over-70s market, someone as pretty, clever and lively as her would stand out from the crowd. I love the way she laughs when we talk about those things; pretending to dismiss it but taking real pleasure from the compliment.

The Baach flies to London in a month, to go cruising on the Queen Mary with her equally mad writer friend from New York. We talked about meeting millionaires on board; she’s decided they’d be good to escort her to dinner and maybe for a dance, but she’s not interested in anything serious. Not even if they were millionaires. Although, she’d probably dance with them twice if they bought her diamonds. Maybe. If they were cute.

She’s also decided her next trip will be with me, to France, after the knee reconstruction, because she thinks French people are nasty and likely to rip her off. I’ll protect her from this because apparently French people would be nice to me.

Her logic is inescapable. To France it is.

UPDATE: Baach just called me to tell me she’d decided to confront the issue, so she called the kissing man, who then invited her around again. He offered her wine (“no, thankyou, I have a blood test in the morning”) and a coffee and a biscuit (“no, thankyou, I can’t eat much sugar”). They had a nice chat about their respective grandchildren, and then he said that she was a lovely lady and asked her if he could kiss her on the lips (*gasp*), to which she replied, “look, fella, I’m a respectable lady, so don’t be getting fresh and we can stay friends. Now, it’s past nine, and as I’m no easy woman* I have to go home now.” Whereupon she swept out of his house and back to hers (about 4 houses away). As she tells me, she has a reputation to uphold, and she can’t just go around KISSING people willy-nilly. What would Jiichama (my grandfather, passed away five years ago) think? And really, as if an eighty year old woman can have a boyfriend and still be respectable! Ridiculous!

She is the bomb.

—————-
* verbatim

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5 responses

29 03 2007
lan

I want a Bach. To the best of my knowledge I’ve never giggled with a grandparent. Ever. We could share?

29 03 2007
Miff

Lan just totally wrote what I was about to write! I want a Baach too! Can we arrange some sort of time-share thingy?My grandma says soe strange things, and tells interesting (at time inappropriate) stories, but I think that may be the onset of dementia… She enjoys herself enormously though!

29 03 2007
alby

Go get ’em Grandpa!! I have to say that while I admire your Baach’s fabulous response, bigger points going to Grandpa for asking. Go you good ol thing! Once a charmer, always a charmer…

29 03 2007
mskp

i agree with alby – PASH ON, OLDS!

29 03 2007
Sherd

Pashing Baaches all round! ew.

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